Friday, July 03, 2009

Saying another goodbye

Yesterday was the funeral of Bo’s grandpa. This wonderful man had it very rough over the past 9 months or so. Years ago he had surgery on his right leg for a clogged artery. But the wound never healed. The infection got so bad they had to amputate part of his leg at the end of last year because there was no circulation from his knee down. Within a week or two they realized they’d have to take more. Then the wound with the infection still wouldn’t clear up. On and on the list goes of the crap that man had dealt with. They had to operate many times on his amputated leg, he got pneumonia, and the infection just got worse and worse. Almost three weeks ago we got a call from Bo’s mom saying he’d stopped eating. The man who we visited just days before had given up.

Grandpa Bob was the last in his family, all of his brother’s and sisters passed a long time ago, and if I remember correctly he’s lived the longest. He was a lover of music; he and Bo used to play guitars together at almost every family event. His apartment was filled with his treasures that he’d found along the river banks. Like arrow heads the size of a penny and a baby mammoths tooth. He was always telling jokes and laughing. Such a happy and positive man, until they took his leg. Looking at photos of Grandpa Bob in his younger days, you see Bo. He looks so much like him it’s uncanny. They are a lot a like in many ways and I’m not sure if that’s going to be a treasure or a sad reminder of who we’ve lost.

In February we also lost his grandma. The family is still grieving over her loss, and now we have to add one more loss. Even though they divorced long before Bo was born, Grandma and Grandpa Bob stayed close for the family, so far as to invite each other to holiday and family events. The two of them used to harass each other, making us all laugh and giving us a glimpse at who they once were as a couple. Then Grandpa Bob would get out his guitar, she’d sit next to him and they’d sing church hymns together. Many times she had her hand on his shoulder. I’ve never seen another divorced couple as close as these two were. I can see them now sitting in heaven, singing hymns. Together again. Together forever. Of course Grandma remarried, so Grandpa Stockton would be there as well, probably fishing or watching a football game like he used to do.

Goodbye Grandpa Bob. You were loved by all. You will be missed by all. I am so glad that I got a chance to meet you. A chance to see where Bo gets his smile and sense of humor. I enjoyed our talks about history, especially yours. I just wish I’d paid better attention and wrote it all down because I’ve forgotten most of what you told me. I may be a granddaughter by marriage, but I loved you just as if you were by blood. You’ve been the grandpa I haven’t had since I was 5 years old. My only regret is I only had a little over 8 years to enjoy with you. It wasn’t enough. A hundred years wouldn’t be enough. Take care of the rest of our grandparents. Take care of my babies. I will love you all forever.

1 comment:

-MissC* said...

Your blog made me cry today. But not for the reason you may think. I'm so sad for Bo, and yet losing our grandparents tends to be the way of life. But your last line "Take care of my babies." That part makes me so sad. Today is a day that I really wish we were together. Right before we met Seth and I lost a baby. (Just a week after moving into THE apartment.) I was only about 9 weeks along. We hadn't even known until I started bleeding. But at 18 it was very hard. I named him Amir. Which means "Beloved".
If we were together today we could drink coffee, cry, look at pictures of our sweet angel babies now, and probly beg Bo to go and get us Sonic. I miss you sis.