Thursday, December 31, 2009

Day 1

Yesterday I noticed the return of the crone.  I realized that I have been avoiding the mirror again.  How did I suddenly realize this?  When I was playing around with my laptops web cam.  I saw myself and was like OMG WHOSE THAT.  Well its her, that crone who hates how she looks, who feels like a whale all the time and who is so embarrassed by how she looks she doesn’t want the hubs to see or touch her.  Fricking great.

So last night in bed, I couldn’t get my mind to shut up its how fat, how disgusting, how you swore this wouldn’t happen again, etc.  No matter how hard I tried, I kept going back to that person on the screen and how hideous she looked.  Now I know those things make everyone look a bit wonky, but this was BAD.  Did you know I have a double chin?   Well neither did I until I saw it on the screen.  I finally told myself to shut my fat mouth up, get some sleep and do better tomorrow.

And I did.  I did a workout this morning on Wii Sports Active, for the first time in LONG time.  I do love that game, it makes the workouts fun.  My favorite is the boxing, OMG do I love the boxing.  I played tennis, inline skating, baseball and basketball, as well as some dancing.  Fifteen minutes and 75 cal burned, I think.  My head is saying woohoo 75cal is not even that bowl of cereal you had for breakfast.  But you know what, I told it to shut its fat ass up, cause doing nothing is what got me here in the first place.

So here’s to day one of trying to do better.  I even put a sticker on the calendar so I can see for myself that I did it.  My goals?  To do this daily, that’s it.  I want to lose weight obviously, but I’m going to try to not to focus on that part.  Because once the pound issue comes into play, everyone get discouraged.  I’ll keep track of what I lose and try very very hard to not focus on how little is lost.  I’m going to try to focus on how well I’m doing the workouts compared to what I was doing. 

I plan on posting daily about this, hopefully it doesn’t annoy anyone.  I think with posting all the stuff here, I’m more likely to keep going since I have witnesses to me slacking off.  Plus I have Miss, who will totally ream me for not sticking to my goal.  

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