Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Another year gone

Tomorrow I turn 28, although it feels like last year I graduated high school.  I’m not sad or scared or upset about getting closer to 30, like many are.  My grandma was 82 and would say your only as old as you feel and she felt like she was still in her 20’s.  If she could do that with a weathered body, tired eyes, hands and feet, I can do that at 28 or 102.  If she can do it, so can I.

What have I learned in my 28 years?  Ha, well a lot and I know that there is so much more to learn.  I don’t know everything and even if I live to be 200, I still won’t know it all.

I know, that a marriage is a special thing.  It’s not about me or him.  It’s about us.  It’s about compromise, its about losing the fight sometimes, it’s about being wrong more than being right, it’s about love, it’s about partnership.  It’s not about competition, its not about being right, its not about being in charge or in control, its not about winning, its not about you.  It’s us or nothing.  It’s a partnership or you are roommates with extras.  It’s so much more than you realize when you first take that step.  It’s so much harder than you ever imagined. 

I know, that relationships come and go and that is how it is.  People evolve throughout their lives, and we grow into different beings.  If a relationship ends, then learn from it and do better next time.  It’s not personal, it’s not to hurt anyone, it’s just what happens.  But friends are a precious luxury that should be cherished and nourished, because our friends are who we lean on when times get tough.  Family isn’t just those who share blood or a name.  Family is more than parents, siblings, aunts and uncles, and cousins.  Friends are a branch of family all on their own.  Don’t just let people drift away.  Don’t just ‘forget’ or ‘put it off’ for another day to contact someone.  Because tomorrow may not come.

I know, that in all the rush to get somewhere we miss out on where we are.  This world has turned into rush rush rush, lets get it done now, I want it now.  And we’re missing out on the little things.  Like making homemade items instead of buying them.  There are so many lost arts because its so much easier to buy it than take the time to put a little blood and sweat, with love sprinkles into something for someone special.  We don’t take the time to wonder about tomorrow because its all about today.  Yet tomorrow is when we see our wrongs. 

I know, that when you are wrong admit it.  Because pouting and throwing a fit shows other’s just how immature you really are.  Only the mature, the strong, can admit when they are wrong and do something to fix it.

And there is so much more that I’ve learned, but there is even more that I need to learn.  Age, to me, isn’t where you get your wisdom or smarts.  To me, its about the paths you take and the pain you endure that creates wisdom.  Those as young as 10 can have more wisdom in some situations that a 50 year old wouldn’t. 

Happy early birthday to me.  Another year gone, another chapter to add to my story.  I never really had a plan for my future, but I do know, that I wouldn’t change my past.  It has got me here, it has made me who I am, and without all that, I wouldn’t have the happiness that I have found.


Darksmurf said...

Happy Birthday!

Nikki said...

Thank you!!! And a tripple thanks for that awesome cake/birthday present.