Friday, July 22, 2011
Can I just say that this is AWESOME. Like freakin, totally, tubular, radically AWESOME!!!
It's only once a week, only for a few hours, and I've only done it twice BUT I'm loving it and I've noticed a huge difference. I can tolerate my kids now. I don't want to run out of the room when they come running and screaming up to me. I don't want to hide away and let Bo handle everything...ok so that is still there but that's normal right? I feel better emotionally. It's....awesome ok you'll just have to deal with my over use of this word. AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME....nope not done with it yet.
This Wednesday I tried to write. You see, I've been staring at the same page for a couple weeks now. I could feel something was wrong again with my story but I couldn't figure out what and I couldn't find the time to figure it out or to fix it. And I couldn't move on with the story no matter how hard I tried. Listen to me now, I was able to focus my entire attention on my story. GASP. It was AWESOME, mwuahahaha. It was invigorating. It was magical. And I fixed it...keeping all things crossable crossed that this stays true... thanks to my night off.
I found the problem, my idea of going one chapter at a time kinda bit me on the ass. Chapter 1 works, Chapter 2 didn't at all, it was an entirely different 'voice' so I scratched it and started over using the material I'd already written as a base. It's now working just fine...except now I'm at Chapter 3 and I don't have the time or the luxury of focusing on my story so I can continue until next Wednesday.
Angry and frustrated sigh.
My goal of writing every day, hasn't happened due to me not being able to focus entirely on my story. And my lack of focus means anything I do write is really crap. CRAP CRAP CRAP. I'm not sure what I'm going to do at this point. I either tweak my day to find a time to focus on my writing or only do it on Wednesday night....which to be honest I hate the idea of using my entire night off to 'work'. Although it's fun as hell and gets me all pumped up, sometimes I'd like to read or take a bath or watch a movie or something else you know?
All I can do right now though is be happy that I fixed a problem without rewriting the entire thing. That is a rare feat my peeps. That is AWESOME.