Monday, March 23, 2009

Stopwatch needed....

I’ve been trying to get something of a schedule going since Jellybean’s arrival. I was hoping that the older she gets the easier it would be. NOPE. She still eats every 2 to 3 hours, still sleeps or cat naps sporadically all day without any pattern and her awake/play times are just as crazy. I remember when I was pregnant my midwife asked me what her awake and sleep patterns were and I told her there wasn’t one. She never did the same things at the same times. And she’s still doing it. When I was pregnant with Munchkin, he was very laid back, was more of a mover than a kicker, and when he did kick it wasn’t crazy or very hard. And he’s still laid back, calm and easy going. I guess this means she’s going to be a crazy, live by the seat of her pants kind of girl. SHIT.

Our sleepless nights are almost at an end…..but we’re not thrilled. The reason? She sleeps with us part of the night, not on purpose by any means. We start out with good intentions; have the timer by the bed set for feedings so we wake up. But we wake up long enough for one of us to shut the timer off then fall right back to sleep. Yay for us getting sleep, shit for having to go through breaking a baby from sleeping with us again. What fun we have to look forward to.

I want to get on a schedule so I can make time every day to play with Munchkin. He is doing awesome with her, but I can see how lonely he is. Since she’s all over the place, I’m always doing something with her or trying to get something done around the house. I rarely have 15 minutes of uninterrupted time to play with him. It breaks my heart hearing him ask if I can play cars with him now, and I have to tell him for the 100th time that I can’t because I’m taking care of her or because I have to get something done while she’s asleep. He’s always gotten upset when Hubby leaves for work, but now he throws a fit. He grabs onto his briefcase or his leg, holds on for dear life and begs his daddy not to go to work. Because he knows that if Daddy is home, someone is there to play with him. It kills me to know that he understands that Daddy plays with him, because Mama won’t. He knows he can count on me to do things for him, but not to play because I’m always doing something else. I hate it. Hate hate hate it. So I’m going to keep trying to get us on a schedule, and that little man is getting his time with me during the day everyday. I just hope that I can accomplish this soon.

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