Monday, January 03, 2011
How about them apples
I've tried to write this here post about 5 times now, and it never fails, the things I say I'm trying to work on creep into the post and contradict what I'm saying. It's becoming more and more obvious how bad my mind has become and how it's affecting my blog.
I'm going to try again, and this time I hope I get it right.
In 2011, my hopes are to take better care of myself. Not just the things that affect the outside, but also the things that affect the inside. Because it's the inside of me that is the culprit for how the outside looks. It's something I've been trying, unsuccessfully, to work on. But because I never give myself 100%, I just keep running in circles. I'm dizzy, and I'd really like to stop treating myself so badly. Not only that, but I don't want my daughter to fall into this family pattern. Being positive and forgetting my past failures, are the top two tasks in this category.
In 2011, my hopes are to be a better mother. I'm great at taking care of them, feeding them, clothing them, etc, but playing with and entertaining them not so much. I come from a family where everyone did their own thing, it's all I've known and it's hard to break that habit. I'd love for my kids to have memories of me playing with them when they were little. It's something I don't have of my own parents.
In 2011, my hopes are to be closer to finishing my book if not finished entirely. I made the decision of shelving the series I was working on for a single book, as it will be easier to get published first. I want to take this more seriously, and find a way to fit in my writing every day. I want to see where I can go with this hobby of mine.
In 2011, my hopes are to find the discipline in me to do the things I need to do. I chose to quit my job when Bailey was born and be a SAHM. However, this entire time I've basically lived as if I was on a very long vacation and did as little as I could get by with. It's made our lives very stressful. I would love to be able to do my 'job' well enough that that the stress and worry is gone. So we can enjoy being at home as a family, instead of rushing around cleaning.
I don't think I'd have the courage or the ability to think it's possible to try yet again, if it wasn't for my wonderful blogging pal, Jodene. Her positivity is contagious.
What are your New Year's Resolutions???
Our duty is to be useful, not according to our desires, but according to our powers - Henri Frederic Amiel