Kicking my own ass here

I started working on the series almost a year ago now.  It's in my head, it's kinda my baby now.  But, it's extremely hard to publish a series as your first book, or so all of my research tells me.  So I sat it aside and picked up a new one.

And now the story I'm working on that I kinda sorta have a title for, a story that I have had in my head for years now, is just sitting there. 

You know that saying to count sheep when you can't sleep?  Well I can't do that, because then I start giving the sheep thoughts and details and conversations and well it turns into a big ol mess.  So I think of a story.  I put myself in a new world, life, everything and just build the story up every night.  If I come to a part I don't like, I just start it all over and try a new direction.  I've had the exact same story in my head for like 5 years now.  I've never written anything about it because, well it was sort of my happy place, my go to sleeping pill.  The oddest damn sleeping pill I swear, I love what I've created during my sleepless nights, but it puts me to sleep everytime.

When I was going over my list of ideas, and believe me it's a long ass list.  I kept thinking of this story.  Even though I wanted to choose one of the stories I started and gave up on, to bring them back to life, none of them 'spoke' to me.  All I could think of was this book.  So I sat down and in less than an hour 13 pages done. 

But now, it's just sitting there.  I'm so stuck it's not even funny. 

At night, I don't focus on much of a background, I just think of the romance part cause well I'm a sap what can I say.  I love being in love, falling in love, the whole shabang.  And so every night, if I wanted to, I could meet the love of my life over and over again.  I know that part of the story, but I'm stuck on the rest of the story because I never built it.  Not a stitch of it.

I've sat staring at the page all day long and I've got nothing. 

I'm beginning to wonder if I maybe I should pick another story, or work on both the series and this story.....I don't know, but right now my eyes and head hurt from staring at the screen.