Tuesday, January 04, 2011

Kicking my own ass here

I started working on the series almost a year ago now.  It's in my head, it's kinda my baby now.  But, it's extremely hard to publish a series as your first book, or so all of my research tells me.  So I sat it aside and picked up a new one.

And now the story I'm working on that I kinda sorta have a title for, a story that I have had in my head for years now, is just sitting there. 

You know that saying to count sheep when you can't sleep?  Well I can't do that, because then I start giving the sheep thoughts and details and conversations and well it turns into a big ol mess.  So I think of a story.  I put myself in a new world, life, everything and just build the story up every night.  If I come to a part I don't like, I just start it all over and try a new direction.  I've had the exact same story in my head for like 5 years now.  I've never written anything about it because, well it was sort of my happy place, my go to sleeping pill.  The oddest damn sleeping pill I swear, I love what I've created during my sleepless nights, but it puts me to sleep everytime.

When I was going over my list of ideas, and believe me it's a long ass list.  I kept thinking of this story.  Even though I wanted to choose one of the stories I started and gave up on, to bring them back to life, none of them 'spoke' to me.  All I could think of was this book.  So I sat down and in less than an hour 13 pages done. 

But now, it's just sitting there.  I'm so stuck it's not even funny. 

At night, I don't focus on much of a background, I just think of the romance part cause well I'm a sap what can I say.  I love being in love, falling in love, the whole shabang.  And so every night, if I wanted to, I could meet the love of my life over and over again.  I know that part of the story, but I'm stuck on the rest of the story because I never built it.  Not a stitch of it.

I've sat staring at the page all day long and I've got nothing. 

I'm beginning to wonder if I maybe I should pick another story, or work on both the series and this story.....I don't know, but right now my eyes and head hurt from staring at the screen.


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Jodene said...

Ok, I love the new design of the blog sooo much that I'm too distracted to comment. On that note ... we get so stuck, distracted or blocked as writers that we think it's not worth the effort the one day we wake up and it flows like it was always written.

Be kind to yourself my friend, because nothing stops your writing more than being your won bully.

PS ... show this to Bo and tell him that I give him permission to twist your ear and say: "Be kind to yourself!!" whenever he see THAT look!

Love you author exquisite!