Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Because his brillance must be shared

Family warning:  Do not continue, the word penis is mentioned many times below...among other sexual and dirty things.

My husband swears he doesn't have an imagination.  But the IM log I'm going to share with you clearly shows he's full of crap....

Nikki: ok well then f them, i was trying to be helpful

Bo: lol

at least you think about Fing sombody :p

Nikki: shut up

Bo: :)

Nikki: my ass is way too raw thanks to you for me to even think of fucking

Bo: next time i'll use lube i guess

Nikki: do you even know what you did? or it may be because you won't stop it, doing it every night, and it's now raw as if i've humped sandpaper

Bo: I know that I rubbed it... alot

Nikki: feels like it

Bo: ... with my teeth

and used my razor toe nails as well

Nikki: u did not lol

haha now that i believe

Bo: then after that I tied 40 grit sandpaper around my penis and rammed it inside dry

Nikki: ow yeah thats just ugh

Bo: then I grabbed the green monster... put super glue on it and rammed that inside... left it in for 1 full second then pulled it out as fast as possible...

Nikki: haha

Bo: then to clean up the super glue I got a full bottle of hand sanitizer... and used my penis to apply it.... was a very cold yet burning sensation but it got the job done and made cleanup a snap

Nikki: omg...i'm putting this in a blog

Bo: lol

for the record.... the act of putting super glue on a dildo and shoving it in one's ass is called "Iron Man" because it makes them walk like a robot... no joke

Nikki: wtf... tell me you didn't just google that...tell me todd gave you the inspiration

Bo: i did it all by myself

Nikki: u are so strange somtimes

Bo: the only inspiration was my imagination and all the crap I made up above

Nikki: see u can make things up

Bo: sometimes... and only dirty things

FWIW the green monster mentioned is a dildo, a ginormous one that's only used in jokes...and when I'm drunk.


jodene said...

Bwahahahahahaha ... I think I'm the only one brave enough to comment ;-)

No comment ...

-MissC* said...

This is epic!!! Makes me want to come home.