Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Piece of advice

Don't take a unisom and then make yourself stay awake.  I'm here to tell you, that shit will kick your ass.

I took one last night because sleep has once again gone on vacation.  Bo actually had the bright idea for me to take it and since I WANT sleep like I WANT Henry Cavill naked between my sheets, I agreed.  The problem was, I had stuff cooking on Cafe World that wasn't ready yet and wouldn't be for 2 1/2 hours.  I took it anyway, this stuff barely works so it won't hurt anything.  Riiight.

By the time I went to bed, I was loopy, not in a 'I'm so high I think I can fly' loopy way, but a 'weeeee I feel so relaxed that a herd of elephants could stampeded right next to me and I wouldn't care' way.  That's where the fun stopped though.  I remember being awake all night and tossing and turning every few minutes because I couldn't get comfortable.  Since I pulled a muscle in my back a few days ago, most movement hurts like a bitch, so I'd have to relax my muscles after every move but then I'd get relaxed and still not be comfy...and I'd move again.  (In the midst of my fitful sleep, he was doing his normal routine of touching me inappropriately and pulling my pants down.)  According to Bo, I woke up every 5 minutes or so to move but I'd fall right back to sleep.  His proof? I was snoring.  He says I did this until about 2am because that was the last time he checked the clock, after that I finally slept.  Except I do not feel like it and you cannot convince me I actually slept last night.

Waking me up wasn't pretty.  He says he tried everything and I wouldn't respond; I don't remember any of it.  He finally got me to respond by kissing me like a crazy person but only with small uh huh moans.  Getting desperate he thought of the one way he knows to wake me de-pants me and start kissing my butt.  Yeah, resourceful little shit aint he?  I barely remember him doing this, until I guess I reached my ass kissing threshold because I was instantly pissed and started yelling at him.  I called him a perv and said he tormented me with that shit enough in the night he had no right or reason to do that to wake me up.  I told him to get a wet wash cloth next time, anything but THAT.  He happily obliged after I'd reamed him a new one, all while my eyes were still cemented shut.  The rag helped, him making me talk helped and I eventually started waking up.

I could be wrong but I think this process started at 7am, once he realized I wasn't waking up any time soon he took Bailey to school and came back about 7:35 or thereabouts and tried again.  It was 8:30 before I finally woke up and got out of bed.

I'm on my second giant mug of coffee, and peeps I feel like if I lay my head down I'd be out cold in seconds.

Lesson learned, we don't fuck with sleeping pills OMFG!!


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