Royal Road Trip day....no clue

My days are starting to blur together, I think it's day four and I THINK we're in New Orleans, but please don't take my word for it.  I've found myself awake in places I didn't remember getting to with members of the Royal family I haven't been introduced yet..

I was told I'd be initiated into the Royal Family and I was soo excited about this prospect even though I wasn't told what that would entail....

I love my new headlights, the high beams don't work so well but my low beams are awesome.

I was also FINALLY given a taste of the Duchess' brownies..

I may be wrong, but I think they may have been tainted.  I saw a unicorn prance by and I swear Mr. Paul Walker proposed to me...I was just about to jump his hot ass when things got wet and cold.

Then the Queen devised a plan to test me, I had to choose between her or the gin.  It was torture for all of us as she pretended to be kidnapped.  But what she doesn't know is how we devised a plan to save her...



And how we debated over our decision over and over and over again



But in the end she was found, dressed in a disguise, drunk and laughing maniacally behind a dumpster



Once she saw that the gin was still accounted for, I was given the all clear because I passed the test.

And then I passed the fuck out with exhaustion from screwing Santa relief.