Where I walk...alone...with my daughter...omg

About 9am this morning I had the idea of going for a walk with Jocelyn.  Alone.  This isn't done.  Like ever.

I sat and worried and paced and chewed my nails until 11:45 when I finally told myself I'm going.  I am going and it will be fine.

Took me another 15 minutes to get myself out the door. Finally, I loaded her up in our stroller, or scooter as she calls it, and out the door we went.

Love my ensemble?  I was rocking the nerdy, pale white girl workout gear big time.  I own nothing to work out in.  Well not really, I own a pair of sweats, and a too small sports bra...but the sweats are my pj's...the sports bra is my hat for my naked rain dances.

We walked around the block one time.

I could have done another lap or three, maybe,  it's 85 and the only thing saving us was the wind plus I'm wearing new sneakers and they do not help my shins like the Sketchers Shape-ups do OMG NO, but I stopped with one.

That was my goal.  Just once, survive the trip without any accidents or issues, or the world ending, and try again tomorrow.

It's beautiful out there.  Bright, sunny, flowers everywhere and on one spot there is this giant willow esk tree that hangs over the fence.

It's like walking through a mystical, magical tunnel where faeries live.

Even Jocelyn had to admire the tree.

Or for me anyway, I'm a sucker for trees and shady spots.  Makes my heart go pitter patter.  And my imagination throw a party.

As usual, once I get into the act, I'm fine.  The anxiety that was eating at me all morning just went away a few feet into the walk.  That's when I noticed how beautiful it was outside, slightly hot and sticky humid, but beautiful.  I looked at the neighbors flowers, wish I had some in my yard.  I looked at all the trees...again wished I had some in my yard.  I looked at all the fluffy white clouds in the bright blue sky, thought I saw a penis and a giant turtle.

I focused on all that and NOT on what I was doing and it was fun.

I want to do it again tomorrow.  I want to make this a daily thing, more than once a day.  Get my ass out there damnit!  Get some of this flubber off!

Of course I can say that now...come July when it's 105 and so humid you can't breathe and are covered in sweat the second you step out the door, I will probably be barricading us all inside to protect us from the burning fire of hell that's out there.



P.S. Forgive the not so great shots, they are iphone pictures, what can you expect!
P.S.S...my photoshop skills suck too.

I made it!

OMG my butt and my thighs, and most especially my damn shins are screaming obscenities at me right now.  The walk wasn't all that tough was about 40 minutes, really it wasn't bad but this fluffy butt and Shape Up shoes could barely handle it.  I had to turn back before we hit the worst part that was all hills.  My face is red, I'm dizzy and light headed feeling.  But I did not puke.  Yay for the small favors.

Right now I'm collapsed on the couch, the only things able to move are my head and arms.  Everything else hurts and feels like it weighs a ton.  Except my bladder but that bitch will have to wait until I can move again.

Weight loss check in week 3

Let’s see, week three here I think and I’ve lost 3 pounds since last week.  Yup.  Basically I lost what I gained last week plus a pound.  Hot damn.

This brings my total to 6 pounds in three weeks.  Not bad considering I’ve only worked out one time.  And that lasted all of 5 minutes, eh hum.  I’ve had to do a ton of adjusting with my suddenly lower daily points, but nothing too crazy.  In fact I find I stay full longer and easier, on some days.  There are days where I think I could eat a cow, with a side of whale, and hippo for dessert.  These days I do go over my points, but just barely and thankfully by the end of the week still have almost my entire weekly points.  See not so bad. 

Am I happy with 6 pounds?  Yes, I have to say I am.  I would love it to be more but wouldn’t we all?  I am thrilled with it since this isn’t hard to keep up with.  If I had to give up everything I love, then I’d probably be bitching and moaning about how hard this is.  But its not, I get to eat anything I want, I just have to make sure I have the points and that I want it bad enough.  That is so much easier than cutting out something I love.  Seriously people, last week I had birthday cake and frozen yogurt on Sunday, Chinese food (two days in a row), and a Pepsi almost every day and still I lost 3 pounds. 

I made a slight goal for myself, and that was to lose 10 lbs by my birthday, if I keep this up, this will totally happen.  We can only hope my body doesn’t go “Nope going to hold on to this plus three more pounds my dear, ha ha deal with it”.

HIGHlarious tale for the day

If you read my post yesterday then you probably can guess what this one is about too.  I decided to give my step aerobic tape a second try….only 3 years later shut your trap.  I forgot the hell that that tape is.  I forgot how hard it is and how fast pace it is.  Needless to say I forgot the entire insane ride that it is.

I lasted two minutes, maybe three.  I really didn’t time it but I barely made it into the workout before my arms and legs tried to fly away from my body in four different directions.  Lift your arms when you step up with your right leg, lower them when you step down with your left.  Now lets do that to the side.  Add leg lifts, add a jump, swing your arms as you step up with your left foot now.  I tried the warm up and this was so fast pace that I was behind within a few steps.  The freak of nature instructor was like “See this is so easy! Let’s shake things up” every three seconds, by the time I thought I was semi doing one move right she shook it up and I almost lost my balance.  Bailey was working out with me, using his step stool.  I came within inches of smacking him once, and a few seconds later tripped off the step and almost fell into him.  He was basically jumping up and down on it, saying “Mama this is hard”.  No shit my son. 

So no did not do this workout.  They made it look so easy, why can’t I get my short self coordinated to do it too?  I will try again, wrapping Bailey in pillows so one of my flying limbs doesn’t knock him out. 

 

Ridonkulous doesn’t cover it

I knew I had gained weight since I stopped Weight Watchers, I just didn’t do the math to see how much until this weekend.  Seven pounds folks.  That is way too much.  My ‘I’ll stop this so we can save money since I know how to do it’ idea didn’t work so well.

We both decided to sign up for it on Sunday.  It blows me away at how easy this program is, minus the measuring and such.  That’s the part that I was skipping on, I was guessing.  Plus I had days where I barely ate, days where I ate too much and then occasionally I’d eat enough, so it threw my metabolism all out of whack…ok so more than it already is.  With us both doing it, it makes it more challenging since last time I did this he lost 30 pounds without even trying.  Because I was measuring everything, he lost without having to do any of the work.  Lucky dog.

Since I’m still nursing my points are much higher than what a normal person would have, but even then that doesn’t compare to what he is allowed every day.  That man can eat like three more meals than I can.  It’s only not fair when frozen custard comes into the equation (See Todd I got it right this time).  That stuff is heaven in a cup, and hell on your butt.

Step it up

Yesterday I did two workouts, one for me and one for Bailey.  A total of  20 minutes and 100 calories.  And guess what?! I am not sore today at all.  Sweet!  Yet ah damn gotta do a harder workout today. 

I was dreading today, I thought for sure I’d be sore since its been a week since I’ve done the workout and it kicked my butt last time.  I woke up and was afraid to move, but when I did, nothing hurt.  I admit, I let go a little squeal before I hopped out of bed to get Jocelyn.

Today I think I’ll pull out one of my old workout tapes and give it a try.  Maybe yoga, or pilates or that step aerobic one I bought and tried one time….

Day 1

Yesterday I noticed the return of the crone.  I realized that I have been avoiding the mirror again.  How did I suddenly realize this?  When I was playing around with my laptops web cam.  I saw myself and was like OMG WHOSE THAT.  Well its her, that crone who hates how she looks, who feels like a whale all the time and who is so embarrassed by how she looks she doesn’t want the hubs to see or touch her.  Fricking great.

So last night in bed, I couldn’t get my mind to shut up its how fat, how disgusting, how you swore this wouldn’t happen again, etc.  No matter how hard I tried, I kept going back to that person on the screen and how hideous she looked.  Now I know those things make everyone look a bit wonky, but this was BAD.  Did you know I have a double chin?   Well neither did I until I saw it on the screen.  I finally told myself to shut my fat mouth up, get some sleep and do better tomorrow.

And I did.  I did a workout this morning on Wii Sports Active, for the first time in LONG time.  I do love that game, it makes the workouts fun.  My favorite is the boxing, OMG do I love the boxing.  I played tennis, inline skating, baseball and basketball, as well as some dancing.  Fifteen minutes and 75 cal burned, I think.  My head is saying woohoo 75cal is not even that bowl of cereal you had for breakfast.  But you know what, I told it to shut its fat ass up, cause doing nothing is what got me here in the first place.

So here’s to day one of trying to do better.  I even put a sticker on the calendar so I can see for myself that I did it.  My goals?  To do this daily, that’s it.  I want to lose weight obviously, but I’m going to try to not to focus on that part.  Because once the pound issue comes into play, everyone get discouraged.  I’ll keep track of what I lose and try very very hard to not focus on how little is lost.  I’m going to try to focus on how well I’m doing the workouts compared to what I was doing. 

I plan on posting daily about this, hopefully it doesn’t annoy anyone.  I think with posting all the stuff here, I’m more likely to keep going since I have witnesses to me slacking off.  Plus I have Miss, who will totally ream me for not sticking to my goal.  

Day of firsts

1) The website, www.bottlednonsense.com, is up and running!!! Hot damn hot damn!!! This is entirely temporary, but since it’s a struggle learning html with two kids and a drugged memory I needed some help. As of now we have nothing really for our front page, so you get to see a list of our favorite authors until we find something else to fill in the spaces. Keep your fingers crossed that it doesn’t take me 6 months to learn html so I can build a better website.

2) Today little Jocelyn is getting avocados! I’m so excited about this for some weird reason. This is more work for me, but I’m so excited to make baby food I can barely contain myself. The steamer and baby food storage containers have been tormenting me since the day I bought them, washed them and stacked them neatly on the counter. That steamer has such a potty mouth.

3) This weekend I ran across an article about a game, yes a game, that I thought would benefit not only me but Bo and Bailey as well. It’s Wii Sports Active, and according to the article even 4 year olds can play it. This will kill two birds with one stone; get me to exercise and let me play with my son. He loves the Wii, he loves playing games and loves it when we play with him. So hot damn here’s a game that will make me sweet and make him giggle all rolled into one neat little package. Now the biggest obstacle for me is to actually play the game. I told Bailey last night that I have to do this every day, so hopefully he can be my drill sergeant and make me do it. Can you picture that? Yeah I laughed too.